1. It'll make for an AWESOME documentary in 20 years
Wow, in 20 years (once we all have enough distance from it to laugh at ourselves), there's gonna be a great documentary made about the rise of the Trump presidency. Probably called "Trump Card" or something. You'll see it pop up on your Netfluhuzon Video Mind Implant and be like "oh I bet that'd be good" but still just watch old episodes of The Office instead, but someone else will watch it and give you the gist.
Surely you've seen those "before and after" pics of George W. Bush and Barack Obama. Both entered the office as young-ish, fresh-faced dudes ready to lead the country. Both found themselves a mere 8 years later withered, grey husks of what they once were. Now imagine the same thing happening to the bright-orange businessman with the world's most baffling combover, Donald Trump. Would the stress and demands of the position finally wipe away whatever hair he actually has? Would he change into a duller shade of orange? There's only one way to find out: by actually electing the guy from The Apprentice.
